Jared Leto stars as the “living vampire” in this long-delayed Marvel project.
Today , after seven ( count ‘ em ) delay , Morbiusofficiallyarrives in theaters . On April 1 , otherwise know as April Fools ' Day , a day where trade name tell terrible jape with the hope of retweets and ilk . IsMorbiusa sick joke on behalf of Sony and Marvel ? Is it really the uniquely cursed token it seems to be found on the seven ( ! ) time it was crowd off the loss docket ?
In a path , the resolution is yes and no . Like most April Fools ' Day jokes , Morbiusis not actually queer . It ’s not bad in theha ha you have to see this it ’s so ridiculouskind of manner . It just feel underbaked and lame — and , lamentably , not weird enough to be any kind of sport .
Morbius — and I promise , I ’ll eventually get around to explaining just what or who a Morbius is — was announced in June 2018 , before Sony had a bona fide hit on its hand withVenom , which prove that , hey , possibly these “ Spidey villain movies without Spider - Man ” might actually work . Originally schedule for release in July 2020,Morbiusjust kept getting press back until it finally arrived today . Even theVenomsequel came and blend in before it did . When the April 1 date was ultimately revealed it seemed like a laugh . However , you’re able to actually buy tickets forMorbiusnow , even though that does n’t mean it still does n’t seem like a collective delusion .
Sony Pictures
Directed by Daniel Espinosa , who made the enjoyableAlienrip offLife , Morbiusstars theking of doing too muchJared Leto as Dr. Michael Morbius . ( Yeah , his birth name is Morbius . ) The full doctor has a rare blood experimental condition and has spent his life look for a cure , which he believe might have get along when he injects himself with a serum he concocted from the interior of vampire bat . But , whoop , that does n’t go as planned and he must now contend with the fact that he vants to suck your blood . Meanwhile , his similarly afflicted childhood pal Lucien ( Matt Smith)—nicknamed Milo in an excessively complicated saga — wants some of Morbius ’ vampire cricket bat juice , take it , and becomes the tragical villain of the saga . At least Smith seems to be risible himself , trip the light fantastic toe around while Leto film his body of work Very Seriously .
From the momentMorbiusbegins the pacing seems off . It bounces around in time , and moves through exposition without prime it in any sorting of tangible office or emotion . Because of the seemingly dateless parade of delays , it seems likely that whateverMorbiuswas think to be got chopped to chip in post - production . The references to the Marvel Cinematic Universe are dropped in two ludicrous citation chronological succession , where Michael Keaton repeat his role fromSpider - gentleman : Homecomingshows up in an plain annoyer ofSpider - Man : No Way Home , a movie which has already amount out .
After drop about an hour and 45 arcminute watchingMorbius , downing Diet Pepsi to push off post - lunch sleepies that seemed only augmented by the dour coloring material pallet and phrases like “ squash racket radar ” said with no speck of satire , it still feel like less moving picture than market to me . Last Nox , the editor Brandy Jensentweeted : “ bless to have a brain just to the full resistant to the concept of ‘ Morbius . ’ you could squeeze about Morbius . you’re able to spell about Morbius and post clips of Morbius . still i will not trust Morbius is real . ”
He’s a vamp.|Sony Pictures
Morbiusis ostensibly a real movie , but just barely . It feel bound to exist more as a can - you - believe - that happened trivia question in future ten , consider I would probably guess this is the end of Sony ’s endeavour to move around the character into any sort of phenomenon . If you go to seeMorbiustoday , the prank ’s only on you .
